Four years before the debut “smooth jazz” stylings of Kenny G [1982], there was Spyro Gyra [1978]. By the by, Kenny G would have to wait until 1985 to have the breakthrough single, “Songbird”. Another by the by, Kenny G got in a fight with China over some tweets he made about the 2014 Hong Kong protests.

Spyro Gyra was inevitable to the pop music scene after Steely Dan’s “Aja”, and Chuck Mangione’s “Feels So Good”. Gravity and momentum were in Spyro Gyra’s favor as they helped pioneer the movement called lite jazz.

spy-ro-gy-ra-rrhe-a

/ˈspīrō jīrəˈrēə/

noun

Explosive expulsion of feces caused from an assault of saccharine lite jazz.

“After being placed on perma-hold by the phone company and forced to listen to lite jazz, I experienced serious spyrogyrarrhea from the music playing, ran to the loo, and barely threw up the warm contents of my stomach out my butt instead of in my pants.”

synonyms: Malaria, Unfuckingbelievable, Yacht Rock Seasickness.

“The last time I had spyrogyrarrhea, I had a difficult time sitting down, and I kept smelling rotten eggs.”