Love® Is Lovely


Ask your doctor if Love® is right for you, it may save your life.

Daily chronic loneliness can be painful, even debilitating. Over 80% of those suffering from the harmful effects of long-term solitude die from negligence, bad diets, obesity and sometimes, even suicide. You are not alone.

Finally, there is a way to overcome perpetual destitution. Many can be treated with Love®, an emotion, available through your doctor, covered by most insurance companies, and maybe even, Medicare. Before trying Love®, consult your physician. Love® is not for everyone. Studies have shown that those suffering with terrible habits, depression and bad taste should avoid Love® at all costs.

Love® may cause dizziness, shortness of breath, for men, an erection that may last up to three hours, nausea, erratic heart palpitations, bloody stools, extreme sweating in the palms, paleness, redness, pain in the joints and muscles, sheer giddiness, constipation, explosive diarrhea, over-exaggerated triteness, migraine headaches, STDs, sudden pregnancy, suicidal thoughts, severe boils on the buttocks, a queer sense of privilege, dripping, pangs of hunger, religious zealousness, fervor, and slight Lou Gehrig’s disease. Those using steroids, Viagra® and Rogaine® should be ashamed. Seek immediate medical attention if any of these side effects worsen. In the case of extreme lack of oxygen, stop Love® for this may lead to infatuation or sudden death.

Although not a cure for self-betterment, some patients feel and look better after trying Love®.

It is time to step out of the shadows of loneliness and fully embrace the wonderment all around you. Remember, Love® is for lovers. At last, end your bleak disposition with Love®.

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