The State Of The Union: Meh


“Not many people know this, but Paris is no longer Paris. An economic miracle is taking place in the United States — and the only thing that can stop it are foolish wars, politics, or ridiculous partisan investigations.
If there is going to be peace and legislation, there cannot be war and investigation. It just doesn’t work that way!”

As a curious American, I watched the State of the Union, starring Trump as a feeble bumbling racist landlord miraculously turned into the President of the United States. It was as lame as the Super Bowl a few nights ago, starring the overexposed New England Patriots, the inexperienced L.A. Rams and the lucky to be a thing, Maroon 5. In short, a bad week for television and it’s only Tuesday.

It’s a shame that Trump is not one bit interested in improving himself, because he is the worst reader of the teleprompter ever. According to Trump, the state of the union is strong, which leads to many questions. Why was acting attorney general, Matthew Whitaker, sweating so much? Why was acting daughter, Ivanka, looking different, face work? Can acting Senator, Chuck Grassley, be any older or whiter? How could illegal immigrants be an urgent national crisis when acting human, Ted Cruz has that beard?

All in all, the whole affair is a waste of everyone’s time, especially with this horrible orator. Trump’s relationship with the spoken word is similar to a demolitionist’s relationship with one brick, no one cares. It is absolutely ridiculous to hear Trump talk about bravery or patriotism. It is as convincing as Jackie Chan speaking fluent Portuguese. There is no connection between Trump and nobility. He has more in common with the shit fly (similar to the fruit fly in that it lays its eggs in shit), unfortunately not the lifespan. Also, a shit fly has more empathy.

May God bless the United States of America.

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