Time Is An Asshole

angry-kawaii-face-clock

A stitch in time, time flies, time is like a river, time and time again, time heals, fuck you time, fuck you, you lousy fuck!

Let me make myself perfectly clear, time is not a racist and does not give two shits about you, whether you’re black, white, yellow, brown, red, or any combination thereof. Time will beat the living shit out of you and you can’t do anything about it. It just marches forward in calculated goose steps, never looking back. It will always disregard the courtesy of leave no man behind. If time shows prejudice to anyone, it is the elderly.

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Reviewing: Welcome To Marwen

Welcome To Marwen

Just when you thought it was safe to go to the theaters.

SPOILER ALERT: Avoid this movie at all costs. I would not be surprised if its toxic contents makes cancer spread through your body quicker. Seriously, you’re better off spending the hour and 56 minutes doing anything else, like going to the dentist.

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New Truth In Advertising

Surgeon_General's_warning_cigarettes

Before we knew that big tobacco purposely made their cigarettes highly addictive, we were mostly worried about emphysema.

There are new warning labels on cigarette packs. This is what it says:

A Federal Court has ordered Lorillard, Altria, Philip Morris USA, and R.J. Reynolds Tobacco (the previous maker of Winston) to make this statement about the addictiveness of smoking and nicotine.

  • Smoking is highly addictive. Nicotine is the addictive drug in tobacco.
  • Cigarette companies intentionally designed cigarettes with enough nicotine to create and sustain addiction.
  • It’s not easy to quit.
  • When you smoke, the nicotine actually changes the brain – that’s why quitting is so hard

What is more important is what this “doesn’t” say. James Dean looked cool when he smoked. He controlled his destiny by choosing the technique of slow suicide. Even though, ultimately, he supported “the man”, he still defied “the man” by using “the man’s” product. In the end, he showed them what’s what by dying in a fiery car crash.

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