“Get Back Under My Umbrella” by RIHANNA Vs. LUDACRIS

Ludacris - Rhianna
Let’s face it, we are a foolish society. On both sides. All sides. There is no greater evidence of this than one who drives a car while texting. Texting is an enormous responsibility; one should concentrate on words and sentence formation instead of dividing that attention with operating a vehicle. Good texting is a result of focusing on what matters.

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“Stir It Up Just Like Heaven” by THE CURE Vs. BOB MARLEY & THE WAILERS

Cure - Marley
In 1981, we lost reggae superstar, Bob Marley, to the dreaded melanoma. Two years before Marley’s death, The Cure hit the music scene with the release of Three Imaginary Boys. If I was a rabid conspiracy theorist (which I am), I would find the thread that makes this truly insidious. Until then, enjoy some emo-reggae.

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“No Sunshine Stroke” by BILLY SQUIER Vs. DMX

Squier - DMX
In a post-truth world created by havoc-mongering current president of the United States himself, Donald “Damn It All To Pieces” Trump; it is very difficult finding words that does not divide our nation further. My writing process is blocked by that selfish lying orange-skinned monster, for every time I pick up a pen, I want to expose his childish behavior further. He is the bully that you are forced to obsess over because he keeps messing with your liberties and lunch money. With that, it is much easier to make mash ups in this current climate. So until a civil war breaks out over Billy Squier and DMX fans, let us enjoy the enforced harmony of the following mash up. I thank you for the privilege of your time.

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“We Belong On A Wrecking Ball” by MILEY CYRUS Vs. PAT BENATAR

Benatar - Cyrus
Never in a million trillion gazillion years, could I have imagined this day. Me, a 55 year old man, making a mash up using a song performed by Miley Cyrus, former Disney TV star from the show, I Heart Carly Banana Montana, and daughter of Billy Ray “Achy Breaky Heart” Cyrus. I am aware that it is not correct on any level. It is inexplicable.

Yet, it is odd that I have no compunction at all about using a gooey Pat Benatar ballad.

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