The Alternate Batman

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In this alternate universe, The Batman has a very short lifespan.

In your puny universe, a very young Bruce Wayne witnessed his father, and especially his mother get shot down by a hoodlum, by the name of Joe Chill in Gotham City’s Crime Alley. On that fateful day, a boy also died, and a vengeful man was born, and he would become The Batman.

While his intentions were true, he inadvertently turned the city he’d sworn to protect more dangerous. The presence of The Batman inspired nutcases to come out of the woodworks to commit outrageous crimes just to become famous. Being a criminal in Gotham was not much different than being a contestant on The Voice or American Idol. But this is your asinine reality.

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Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Whenever You Get Around To It

Luthor

Lex Luthor is a wealthy, power-mad American business magnate. At one point he was the President of the United States. He only served 3 years, 2001-2003, because he could not keep his corruption in check.

Lex Luthor, Superman’s greatest nemesis, was plotting. World dominance would rightfully be his, if only he could get rid of that meddling Boy Scout Kryptonian!

Before continuing, it is peculiar, yet true that Superman’s greatest friends, enemies and things closest to him, shared the initials L.L. Lana Lang, Lois Lane, Lori Lemaris, Lightning Lad, Lancelot Link, Chicago-based DJ, Larry Lujack, actresses: Linda Lavin, Lucy Lawless, Lucy Liu, Lindsey Lohan, and college admissions scandal socialite, Lori Loughlin, lava lamps, Lincoln Logs®, Loretta Lynn, Lyle Lovett, Lisa ‘Left Eye’ Lopes, Mexican sensation, Los Lobos, Laa-Laa of the Teletubbies, Liver Lord, Livid Lass, and the other Lex, Lex Luger.

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Aquaman Meets On Demand TV

Ramona Fradon Reflective Aquaman

Aquaman has a brief moment of peace before enduring horrible cinema.

Aquaman turned off the TV by throwing the remote control at it, shattering it all over the place. He had just seen the worst movie ever. Bohemian Rhapsody. It is mind blowing that within this insipid dreck of cinema, Rami Malek found room to portray Freddie Mercury respectfully. One could almost believe that Freddie Mercury was capable of saying such contrived idiocy.

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With Great Power…

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With great power comes great responsibility. With great responsibility comes ridiculous guilt complex.

The Amazing Spider-Man returned home after a very grueling day of web-spinning, crime fighting and being chased and misunderstood by the police. He was wiped out. At last, he could be plain old Peter Parker and get some much-deserved rest. After all, with great power comes great responsibility, which includes taking care of your wellbeing. It also includes doing the dishes, but Peter Parker was far from perfect.

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