What Asian Men Want

What Asian Men Want
Trump was befuddled this morning, more so than usual. It was evident in his lumbering gait, which was, against all odds, heavier and clumsier. His lips were quivering. His brows tensely furrowed. This meant he was thinking. Thinking like a caveman obsessed with terminal cancer.

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Bert Was In A Funk

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Bert [left], a muppet, in happier times, stoned and naïve.


He knew he was being phased out. Every week, one less sketch. He had become invisible on the set. As an experiment, he stayed in his trailer the whole day. No one noticed. It was only a matter of time before he would just be an extra in a musical number.

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Tales From The Pharmacy

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Back in the day, Robitussin® came in a glass bottle and the box was made of wood. Another case that progress ruins packaging.

 

I’m 14 years old. I’m at the drug store seeing if they got any new comic books. I am intrigued by a new candy product called Charm’s Blow-Pop®, which is supposedly both a candy and a chewing gum. My thoughts of how ludicrous this concept is was interrupted by a famous rock star, who half whispers to me, “Hey, do me a solid, and buy these three bottles of Robitussin® cough syrup for me.” Keep in mind, this was the ‘70s, so anyone could buy anything as long as they had the money and proper intent. He gives me a handful of wadded up bills. “Keep the change. I’ll meet you around the corner.”

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Super Villain Switch Up

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Kraven The Hunter was fortunate that his birth name was not Jagginoff.

On a typical day, Kraven The Hunter resides in an existence commonly known as The Marvel Universe, or Earth-616. [WARNING: ORIGIN ALERT!] He was born Sergei Kravinoff, a misguided Russian immigrant, and the son of an aristocrat. Perhaps it was this combination that turned him into a maniacal big game hunter seeking only to hunt The Amazing Spider-Man. Later, he would become the founding member of The Sinister Six, a collective of villains sworn to destroy their common foe, your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

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