The Alternate Superman

other alternate superman

In this alternate universe, Stuperman is overtly ignorant. So much so that he spells stupor as stuper. This is his origin.

Jak-el and Burro, prominent Kraptonian mega-scientists, who were also married to each other, feared this day would come, but not this soon. They weren’t ready. They only had time to build one small prototype of a rocket to escape. If only the science council had listened to their pleas to stop drilling, instead of mocking the couple by drilling willy nilly to prove some kind of point, even the dentists. Now their planet is hopelessly vibrating itself out of existence. As they embraced, knowing their days were numbered, they turned to their baby son, Guz-el, who was sleeping soundly in what can be best described, a futuristic Ikea® crib.

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Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Whenever You Get Around To It

Luthor

Lex Luthor is a wealthy, power-mad American business magnate. At one point he was the President of the United States. He only served 3 years, 2001-2003, because he could not keep his corruption in check.

Lex Luthor, Superman’s greatest nemesis, was plotting. World dominance would rightfully be his, if only he could get rid of that meddling Boy Scout Kryptonian!

Before continuing, it is peculiar, yet true that Superman’s greatest friends, enemies and things closest to him, shared the initials L.L. Lana Lang, Lois Lane, Lori Lemaris, Lightning Lad, Lancelot Link, Chicago-based DJ, Larry Lujack, actresses: Linda Lavin, Lucy Lawless, Lucy Liu, Lindsey Lohan, and college admissions scandal socialite, Lori Loughlin, lava lamps, Lincoln Logs®, Loretta Lynn, Lyle Lovett, Lisa ‘Left Eye’ Lopes, Mexican sensation, Los Lobos, Laa-Laa of the Teletubbies, Liver Lord, Livid Lass, and the other Lex, Lex Luger.

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“The Watcher Watches Superman Light Up A Christmas Tree” by CAST OF SUPERMAN Vs. DR. DRE

Watcher Superman
Since it is Halloween week, it seems appropriate to celebrate and honor the often masked superhero. Yet, the mention of Christmas this early in the year is gauche. Sometimes the theme song from “Facts Of Life” encapsulates everything perfectly. “You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have The Facts of Life.”

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Superman’s Cape

450px-Ripley's_Believe_It_or_Not!_Hollywood_-_Superman's_Cape_(9306298648).jpg

A cape does not a Superman make, nor does it make America great. Look it up.

 

When it comes to the NFL, Kanye West is absolutely correct, “All we really have is today. We just have today.” True to form, everything else Kanye says is absolute idiocy. If his words could take human form, it would be the guy everyone wants to spit on instinctively.

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