A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, hitchhiking was commonplace.
The following is a pre-Covid 19 tale, which would explain the unsettling naiveté. The social distancing exemplified is pure happenstance and not mandated by law. Sadly, stupidity remains consistent through crisis as well as normal times.
And now:
In a not too distant future, you will probably find yourself explaining to a trillennial what a post office was, and the whole time while you’re trying to convey a building where mail services happen, the trillennial is actually thinking about the kissing game.
It was the Monday after Thanksgiving. It was not a good day to be waiting in a very long line at the post office. In fact, there is never a good time for waiting. Nonetheless, it was not a proper reason for what ensued.
Adding cheese to the hamburger became a thing in the late-1920s to mid-1930s, adding a Chilean sea bass to the hamburger has not yet been invented.
The cheeseburger did not have a chance. Not in the hands of that hungry man. Deep down, it knew it was its own damn fault for smelling so good, and oh my God, for being so juicy. If it didn’t do something drastic, it would surely end up in that man’s mouth, and ultimately his stomach, only to be transformed into vomit or poo.
More than 1,000 people die annually from falling down stairs. To put things in perspective, 33 people have died this year from vaping.
In retrospect, Vince Ainsley should have been more conscious of retaining balance than paying so much attention to his unmatched socks, especially at the top of the unfamiliar rickety stairs. Hindsight always sounds like a know-it-all you want to punch in the damn face.
The sound of a switchblade and a motorbike.
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