The Lonely Ass


This is a duck’s ass, a very popular hairstyle in the 1950s, not to be confused with the ass, an animal of the horse family.

The ass took a deep breath and got a good whiff of its own stench. It was visibly displeased, yet at the same time, indifferent, very much like today’s Republicans. After all, if it stinks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, blame it on socialism.

Unlike most asses, this particular ass was gifted with the power of understanding and processing three emotions: remorse, jealousy, and punctuality. It should also be noted; the ass could speak. To its credit, it had eight more words in its vocabulary than Trump.

As expected, the ass had a difficult time fitting in. It was the metric polyhedron in a world of circles and squares. It was too intelligent for the rest of the asses, and too stupid for every thing else. The inevitable truth was, it was worthless. It is sad that even with its advantages, the only thing the ass was on time for was its own untimely death.

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