All The Chips


The Sanbot® will make people seem as ridiculous as the landline phone.

“I’ve only got time to say this once, so listen up.” Mr. Barker, as usual, had his resting sober business face on, as he addressed his personal assistant, Jim Barker, no relation, but worth noting, he got hired solely because of the shared surname. Jim nodded.

“You need to get Dr. Barker [Again, no relation, but worth noting the only reason he’s his doctor is because of the last name.] on the phone and decipher his phone message. I swear that ass speaks like he writes, illegibly. Something or another about chronic pussitis. Is that even a thing?”

Jim continued to nod.

“Also, I need you to email me the Power Point® presentation on projected sales for the fourth quarter. Make sure it’s updated. I’ve got a few stops to make before meeting the investors. I don’t need to remind you we need this. If we don’t get our budget approved, we are totally Blockbusters®.”

Steadily, Jim nodded.

Mr. Baxter grabbed a floral umbrella and his briefcase. He saluted Jim as he walked out. Jim nodded again. Moments later, he pulled out the Airbuds® from his ears.

“Oh my God. Mr. Barker, you were so right. That was the best podcast I’ve ever heard. Mr. Barker? Mr. Barker?”

Jim failed to mention that he lost his vision earlier in the day from an inopportune meeting with a frisky laser beam.

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