Once Ceptional, Twice Ex-Ceptional


Ella just didn’t sing those lullabies like she used to, not since the new president took office. Something was not right, he was just too sly and sneaky for his own good. Also, he looked funny. Gone were the soulful yodels and the trills of pure pleasure. In its place, just doubt and nothing short of paranoia. She found what passed for happiness in stirring her tea with a spoon she stole from the Town & Country restaurant. It was beautiful. It kind of looked like this:


Before, when she was days younger, September of 1968 to be exact-ish, she was just recovering from the assassination of JFK and more recently, RFK. To move forward, she had to justify these acts of violence towards the Kennedy family. In order to have a clear conscience, she cheated. She forced herself to believe that bad things are going to happen to the rich people. After all, they hobnobbed with evil greedy people. These are the sorts who see no value in human life if a buck or two can be stolen. It cannot be argued, money loves money.

One may assume that Ella was named after the exceptional jazz stylist, Ella Fitzgerald. It only makes sense she was born in the right era. That assumption is dead wrong. She was named after socialite, Ella Funt. Her son, Allen would go on to produce the hit TV show, Candid Camera. Ella Funt gained fame for her gray pallor and trunk-like nose, which greatly contributed to the other lie Ella would tell. Of course she was named after Ella Fitzgerald.

It would not be until August 9th, 1974 that Ella found her true singing voice again. It was no coincidence that it was immediately after Nixon’s resignation.


2 thoughts on “Once Ceptional, Twice Ex-Ceptional

  1. Pingback: Author Interview – Isabelle Kenyon – “This is not a Spectacle” (Contemporary Poetry) | toofulltowrite (I've started so I'll finish)

  2. Pingback: Erratum: We all succumb to gravity except me. | The Home Of DJ Sung Mo Koo

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