A photograph of Dustin one week before his demise.

It was the first day of Dustin’s life. Actually, more like his 12,153^rd day, for he was 33 years old. Technically, it was his umpteenth first day of his life. He one of “those” guys. At every possible given chance, he would declare a change of lifestyle. By the end of the day though, he ends up being the same person he was, in essence, the arc of a sit-com character.

This time though, he was really on a course to true transformation. It was not a coincidence that today was Halloween. He stared at himself in the mirror, and his mouth was wide open in shock. He looked just like him. His whole life, he wondered why he had never heeded the words of his acquaintances. He bore an eerie resemblance to the Henry Winkler. Yes, the same actor who played the legendary Arthur “The Fonz” Fonzarelli on the hit ABC series Happy Days.

Hair goop glistened in his hair. It was too cool. He was literally and figuratively counting his chickens before they hatched, and decreed that he would make this a thing. From here on out, he would be the relevant 21^st century Fonzie, not that decrepit creature Henry Winkler turned into.

He was so thankful he didn’t run with his initial idea of dressing up in a ghoulish manner. He was going to be a civil war soldier with gangrene, flies and all. Dustin was about to comb his hair, stopped himself, and opted to give a good old thumbs up. It felt right.

Ghoulish