Sad, yet true, Senator Chuck Grassley from Iowa thinks he’s secretly giving you the middle finger, or cleaning his ear. In other words, he’s old and senile. Image Source.

Grassley,

Thank you for making it easier to sleep at night. With good strong people like you at the helm, I am no longer worried about a country unfit for old men like us. I assume you’re a man of so much work there is no time left for play, so I will fill in the reference. There is a Coen Brothers film called No Country For Old Men based on a novel of the same title, written by Cormac McCarthy. It was a frightening fictional world, which you are in the process of preventing from becoming a reality. Thank you again.

I am most impressed by your ability to cut off the whiny proclamations of the inane Democrats. It has been nothing short of brilliant! The last thing this country needs is to hear their pathetic caterwauling. When I hear a Democrat beyond their first sentence, I no longer hear words, just indecipherable simpering and crybaby sniffling.

No offense to soon-to-be Supreme Justice Kavanaugh, but when he started to cry during his “testimony” I was wondering if he was actually a Democrat. I look forward to a time when Kavanaugh can drop the pretense and show his true self, so instead of weeping, he can repeal the important things like Roe vs. Wade. After that, maybe we can get Judge Thomas off the Supreme Court. I can’t stand that mustache any longer, which is really code for, it’s time to remove color from the United States Supreme Court.

I am fully aware that we all live in the same world, so yes, one step at a time before we eventually get rid of the broads too, because you know how “emotional” they can be. I’m sure a scholar like you knows this already, but hysterical behavior is derived from the Latin or Greek for women who complain loudly.

Kudos on your stonewalling tactics on monkey Booker and the chicks, as well as the other welfare sympathizers during the hearings. All this in front of the whole country to see. It is futile to resist the preservation of old white power. Viva white men! You are the man, Grassley! The white man! Thank you for strengthening our status in America.

Allow me to be bold, but if I had a father half the man as you, I may not be in prison today. Your unwavering conviction could father up to at least a thousand men. You represent pure aptitude and restore my faith that if I ever am allowed to opportunity to re-enter society, it will be a better place for citizens like us.

Yours truly,
Rape “Rapey” McRaperson