“Knock Knock.”


A real life Rube Goldberg machine that complicates the easiest of tasks for the sake of inconvenience.

The words penetrated a stressful hour of silence, which felt like a fortnight. This is how time elapses in the penitentiary.

Instinctively, Sappy McSapperson took the bait and responded, “Who’s there?” Little did he realize, these would be his final words.

It was part of an elaborate scheme very much like the ridiculous children’s game, Mouse Trap™ created by Ideal® in 1963, but with more dire consequences, yet maintaining the complex and overwrought procedure of setting one consequence against another to a less predictable outcome.

Lookoüt Von Lookoütsen gave the signal that all was clear, which alerted Middleman Middleman Middleman to make the designated bird whistle, which triggered Activate Activopolous to poke Stab “Stabby” Stabbenberg to do his thing.

In a matter of seconds, Stabby was wiping the blood clean from Little Stabby, his trusty knife, with Sleevey, his equally trusted sleeve.

Immediately ensuing the thud of Sappy’s dead body hitting the ground, the man who first spoke said, “Freedom.”

Randy Random Randomio could not resist and asked, “Freedom who?” Random slumped forward dead killed by a poison dart.

“Freedom inner demons before they fester all up inside of you, or else you will die painfully from a severe ulcer that could have been easily prevented.” He waited for a response, anything. There was none.

MORAL: Knock knock jokes are never funny when you’re a hardened adult.

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