Happy Fourth Of July, my fellow Americans. Since it is Independence Day, we are entitled to express ourselves in a safe and responsible manner. Thank you, First Amendment. Today, I am going to go all introspective, and use a graph to reveal my findings.

This would be a great graph if the red represented all the things I have done correctly in my lifetime, but no. This graph represents my friends and acquaintances on my phone, excluding family, restaurants, doctors, and other business dealings. If I had included restaurants and doctors, there would be a wee bit more diversity increasing the Asian faction.

I fear that my Facebook contents would show a similar trend indicating that I might be slightly racist. Sad.

In my defense, as an adult, I’ve never judged anyone by the way they look, but by the way they behave towards me. On the other hand, I really like white people, like the Academy Awards liked Sally Field. Then again, I’m not going to search out new people in order to achieve ethnic diversity in my contacts.

If I applied this poll on my musical taste, I think it would be more balanced. I am very frightened what the results would be if the qualifiers were based on gender, religion, political faction or Cubs-Sox.

#JamesBrownIsCryingInHeavenOrHell, #JamesBrownProbablyWouldNotLikeMe

Trying this for the first time, so forgive me if it doesn’t work. It is a mash up of Jay-Z’s “Change Clothes” and Ann-Margret’s “Swingers Holiday”.