Three Scandals Ago

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“We condemn in the strongest possible terms this egregious loss of hair on many sides, on many sides.” Image Source

Dear current president of the United States, Donald Trump,

Before I ask my question, I would like to commend you on finally acknowledging your hair-challenged scalp. It’s nice that you are expanding your repertoire of bullying, lying, blaming, no-colluding/really colluding, groping, tweeting, and golfing. Self-deprecation must be difficult for you, especially with those small hands, smaller brain and that microscopic black withering thing that pumps blood through your body. I found that you’re actual quote, “I try like hell to hide that bald spot,” could have been better. Here’s a suggestion: Bad hair day? More like, bad hair life. Lock her up.

You’re welcome.


Here is my question. It’s been just over a year since you have been named president of the United States, and you appear to have an agenda of stealing everything that is not nailed down. I hear you. Good on you. Frankly, I don’t blame you for letting greed get the best of you. It is instinct. It is the same instinct/privilege of not showing your tax return. This is how “businessmen” do the “art of the deal”. That’s what you do. Why stop? You are the Lance Armstrong of doping.

What confounded me is how conversant you are with racism. You are a “natural”. But after doing a little research, I understand, and I forgive you. It runs in your family. You can’t change your blood. Your father was arrested for marching with the K.K.K. in 1927. We all know it takes at least two generations before you can remove that blind hatred, so if Donald Trump Jr. Jr. turns out to be a racist, it’s on you. If you could you would be a better person, underneath that bloated white pig exterior, I see a good person trapped inside another one, the one you haven’t finished eating.

I do not love the confidence you exude when you speak to your base. I feel that you say things that are truly inappropriate without having a white pillowcase hood over your head. It’s confusing. It’s like seeing a talking mime. It’s hard to tell if you’re really a full-fledged racist or some half-assed non-racist trying to be funny. Keep up the “work”.

Sincerely,

Sung Mo Koo

Conversant

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3 thoughts on “Three Scandals Ago

  1. I fear you will not reach POTUS for a number of reasons. #1. You speak in full sentences. #2, You use big words like “conversant.” #3. You have a funny name. He may suspect you are from a shithole nation. #4. You use over 140 spaces at a time in your messages. #5. You seem to have a limited knowledge of business acumen and I suspect have a very high golf handicap.

    All in all, I think your message has little chance of circulating in that balding little head.

    Liked by 1 person

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