He looked at himself hard and sternly in the mirror before applying a clump of white make up to his face. Ohno The Clown was on top of his game. So much so, for the first time in the nine years of working with Cockamamie Circus Group, he did not smell the elephant manure, hay and grease paint that usually sickened him. Things were finally looking up for Ohno.
Sitting on top of his make up table was the latest issue of “Rolling Stone” magazine, and he was on the cover. Of course, he was frowning. He took a deep breath to puff out his chest, and resumed to transforming himself into a clown. If he had taken the time to actually read the article, he would realize this sense of pride was truly hollow. The sad fact is, Ohno is one of 32 million illiterates in America.
“According to the National Assessment of Adult Literacy (completed most recently in 2003, and before that, in 1992), 14 percent of adult Americans demonstrated a “below basic” literacy level in 2003, and 29 percent exhibited a “basic” reading level.”
In short, Ohno mistakenly revealed his father was a pedophile when he really meant paraplegic. Also, Ohno stated he was friendly with the Nazis when he meant Mitzi Gaynor.
The most discriminating quote, which was thankfully overshadowed by his ignorant admissions was, “Laughter is the native language of wide-eyed idiot peasants.” Luckily for him, no one reads nor cares about “Rolling Stone” magazine anymore.