The relationship between science and scientists is very much like love to a lover, or crystal meth to the new Mr. Howell on the reimagined “MTV’s Gilligan’s Island.”

He smacked the palm of his hand firmly against his forehead hard. It sounded like a firm seven year bitch slap. The reason for this violent act of self-infliction was unknown, but this was certain. It hurt. Kevin Ridiculous was at the peak of frustration, and it was of his own making. He was one of those jack-of-all-trades, and master of nothing. This is not to say he was useless, but in comparison to his peers, he was. He put too much pressure on himself for all the wrong reasons. This, as well as his addiction to morphine, was what prevented him from success.

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