Hey Reality, Cool It!

That’s right, yeah, I’m talking to you reality; with all your Trump speak, terrorists, shootings, texting while driving, North Koreas, Dennis Rodmans, warts and all. All you all need to slow your shit down and take a breather, you’re messing with my fictional reality.

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Your Horoscope

If today is your birthday…

Dear Gemini, check your bad twin self, before you wreck yourself. Today is a bad day for social media. Watch your back as well as the backs and hips of your peers. Speaking of backs, people are talking behind yours. To react rashly could prove disastrous.

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Gitanes

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I bought a pack of French cigarettes today.

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Like The Pot Calling The Kettle Black

From the Washington Post:

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