A Week Before Lemonade Observance Day™


I can not see the joy. I can not hear the glory. I can not feel the excitement. I just smell a lot of stank camels.

It was official, even decreed. It was Double Negative Appreciation Day™. If the parade was any indication, it was the biggest non-religious holiday ever, of all time. It was May and the town known best as Schaumburg had serious cabin fever. Winter had been excruciatingly long and bitter.

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