You Can’t Spell Diet Without Die


Don’t be a cannibal, be a cannotibal.

This was the exact reason why we decided all those years ago that we would never consume other humans. This pile of disgusting regurgitated glop composed of the pesky neighbor and spinach is why I wished we had hardwood floors instead of carpeting. Truth be told, the guy deserved to be eaten, for looking so delicious.

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Cannibal Junior High


The cafeteria, also known as the dining hall or the canteen. A place where children coerce their peers to laugh so hard they snarf-barf milk out of their nostrils.

Joe leaned forward, “Hey, you gonna eat that?” He pointed to either a large fingernail or a small toenail.

Donny picked it up and studied it, and then casually tossed it on Joe’s tray, “Have at it.”

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