The only thing more exciting than a flow chart is a flow chart on fire or in the process of being crumpled.
Welcome to Sungmokoo.com’s choose your own adventure. For those of you not in the literary loop of reading gimmicks, choose your own adventure is a narrative where the reader answers multiple-choice questions to obtain one of many probable storylines. And now, “Unique, Oblique, And Greek Bleak.”
It must be an honor to have a complex named after you. I wonder if Lou Gehrig felt the same way after having a disease named after him.
“The fuck?” Seymour Butzandasses was confounded at first, until anger set in. He dramatically raised his fist in the air and proceeded to shake it like a possessed mad man. His intended target was the bus that sped off without once slowing down. What was most troubling was the wicked grin on the driver’s face. As everything else that has ever happened to Seymour, he took it personally. To make sure we’re all on the same page, he pronounced his name Seymour, as in: he was very curious, so he paid full admission to see more.
True science fiction is how other forms of life judge Earthlings. The opposite of counterintelligence is sheer idiocy. Drinking soda pop makes you more susceptible to brainwashings.
SPOILER ALERT: After the following story ends, the world blows up, ending civilization as we know it.
He was so convincingly aghast, he shivered uncontrollably, like someone with Parkinson’s disease in the freezing cold being jolted by many currents of electricity. It did not look natural. He was trying to comprehend the depth of depravity he had just heard. What kind of sick mind could construct such pure evil under the guise of a joke? Who was crueler, the teller of the joke, or the two guys laughing with great difficulty?
God considered fist bumping Melba, but wasn’t sure if she would survive.
Melba Toast was giddy, and she wanted to tell the world, so she did. To clarify, her name is pronounced just as it is spelled, Melba. It mattered not that it was pouring rain, or that she was drenched to the bone. She had found God, or rather, God found her.
The sound of a switchblade and a motorbike.
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