The Greatest Underdogs

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0-10, The Gophers were always the underdog team.

“Look, wag nuts, I want to make one thing clear. When they call us underdogs, I am fully aware that some of you think it’s a good thing. It’s not! It’s just the nice way of saying we’re nothing but losers.”

Coach Rudnick hocked up a healthy hairy loogie and spit hard, before downing a bottle of water. He looked at the empty bottle and threw it at the football players.

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Dubious Is As Dubious Does

Face to face

The calm in the small to tiny room was unsettling. Two strangers with opposite agendas standing face to face. Erratic breathing, one from a deviated septum, it is whimsical like rattling blinds in a windowless room. Not a word had been spoken, which is typical boneheaded behavior for men, and this only heightened the tension.

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Letters In The Near Future

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Dear Larry,

I regret to inform you of your son’s passing. I hope you will find comfort with the following: Richard Stack, or Rick Stack, as he was known by his fighting peers, died for our country, which he loved dearly. I might add, the United States reciprocally loved him in return. He sacrificed his life for the highest value, democracy, not to be confused with Democrats. To save you the embarrassment, I had to clarify that. A lot of people make that mistake. Most important, it was in no way my fault.

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I Love “Soulful Strut”

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“Soulful Strut” is the song you don’t know by name, but odds are you love it. Instrumentals are tricky that way. Unless you know, you just don’t. The original definitive version is performed by Young-Holt Unlimited in 1968. This tune is the soundtrack to the happiest day of your life. Oh yeah, it puts that extra bounce in your step. You can finally say that you’ve walked on seventh heaven, and not the WB television show.

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