The Apes Of Wrath

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It is almost ironic that in North Korea, this is the symbol for I love you, man.

Her dying words were as indignant as expected. They were, “Get your fucking hands off me you God damn chinks.” Her misguided racism was aimed at three black men who tried to help her after she was struck hard by a bus. Technically, she should have been dead before she could speak her final words, but that’s how Amanda Sykes rolled. She always got the last word.

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Bert Was In A Funk

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Bert [left], a muppet, in happier times, stoned and naïve.


He knew he was being phased out. Every week, one less sketch. He had become invisible on the set. As an experiment, he stayed in his trailer the whole day. No one noticed. It was only a matter of time before he would just be an extra in a musical number.

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Lost In Time

time travel

This is exactly what time travel looks like.

I have been drifting through time of late, and it is unsettling. What I did minutes ago seems like weeks ago, and what I just did hasn’t happened yet. It’s enough to drive one mad. This is what happens when you reach a time coordinate in which you did not exist. There are many rules to time travel, follow them or die.

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Tales From The Pharmacy

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Back in the day, Robitussin® came in a glass bottle and the box was made of wood. Another case that progress ruins packaging.

 

I’m 14 years old. I’m at the drug store seeing if they got any new comic books. I am intrigued by a new candy product called Charm’s Blow-Pop®, which is supposedly both a candy and a chewing gum. My thoughts of how ludicrous this concept is was interrupted by a famous rock star, who half whispers to me, “Hey, do me a solid, and buy these three bottles of Robitussin® cough syrup for me.” Keep in mind, this was the ‘70s, so anyone could buy anything as long as they had the money and proper intent. He gives me a handful of wadded up bills. “Keep the change. I’ll meet you around the corner.”

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