This man. This dick. This ridiculous dick of a man. Why, he oughtta…

He deserved to die. No one was made more aware of this than the man himself. When he looked in the mirror, all he could see staring back was something that was the complete opposite of decent. Typically, the word would be indecent, but it doesn’t carry the weight of the gritty underbelly he resides in. It doesn’t define how he is the shit that clumps to the bottom of ones shoe at a formal event, or the last piece of vomit stuck in ones teeth. After a quick introspection, he merely shrugs his shoulders before walking away.

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Plastic surgery is like a box of chocolates ravaged in a microwave oven. Just saying.

A parade of ambulance chasers formed a long line outside of Stephanie Kim’s hospital room. She had just received cosmetic surgery to make her inferior Asian eyes bigger (her thoughts, not mine). She wanted less almond-shaped, and more walnut. In three words, she got fucked. If you were inclined to add a fourth word, royally!

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Blistered sisters administer verbal fisticuffs to the White man’s sinister twisted passive/aggressive laws that benefit only them.

“Never in my life have I met such cantankerous men,” Dolores Regan had to catch her breath before she could continue, “One can’t help but wonder what sort of upbringing could rear such contempt. If I had to guess, it’s years of coddling bedwetting.”

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