We last left off with Chester the Rat spitting out the vile taste of feces from his mouth, and now it’s my turn. I have just read the worst comic book ever. It was so bad, I would even tell my neighbors to avoid it. You have no idea how much I hate my neighbors, so this book must be pretty bad for me to actually talk to them. I’m confident they don’t even know what a comic book is, let alone a book.
Chester is a brown rat.
Chester had to simmer. He could feel irrational heat on his head, boiling from within, just atop his brain. It was either pure anger or his rat sense was tingling in overdrive from the presence of nearby humans. FACT CHECK: Like the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, rats have a spider sense called rat sense.
We are three years away from the much-anticipated Year of the Rat. The year 2020 promises prosperity and answers to the age-long mystery: Why? According to the Chinese, give the round eyes more sweet and sour sauce packets and make them beg for the hot mustard. Yet, as profound as the Chinese profess to be, that is not the answer.
In order to answer a question correctly, a question must first be formulated. Duh. The question at hand is simple: Why the year of the rat?
A photograph of Dustin one week before his demise.
It was the first day of Dustin’s life. Actually, more like his 12,153rd day, for he was 33 years old. Technically, it was his umpteenth first day of his life. He was one of “those” guys. At every possible given chance, he would declare a change of lifestyle. By the end of the day though, he ends up being the same person he was, in essence, the arc of a sit-com character.
The sound of a switchblade and a motorbike.
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