Gubernatorial And Raisinets®

Bruce_Rauner_August_2014

“It hurts when I go like this, doctor.”

It is a bleak time to watch television in Illinois. Political ads for governor, assessor, attorney general, county board president, dog catcher, and  congressman dominate the airwaves. It is annoying, repetitive, and clattering. As of February 2018, Illinois’ gubernatorial candidates alone, have raised over $133 million for their campaigns. That’s a lot of scratch, which could be better spent on fixing just about anything else. Instead, it is wasted on these sniveling politicians. Here’s an idea, half that money should go to repairing our decrepit infrastructure. This is how hungry people feel when they watch someone throw out a piece of steak.

Continue reading

Back In My Day

Natural_History_American_Bald_Eagle_6c_1970_issue_U.S._stamp

Back in my day, we used stamps to mail letters, snail mail, and the American bald eagle was bigger than Elvis Presley.

When someone says back in my day, it’s just another way of saying how much the world has changed in his or hers life span. Also, it’s an opportunity to point out that someone needs to shut the fuck up with his or hers trivial nonsense.

When I say back in my day, here are the parameters: I am referencing 1970 to 1980. For those not familiar, it was the decade from 40 years ago.

Continue reading

Peanut Butter & Jelly & Hollywood Nights by BOB SEGER Vs. CADILLAC DON & J-MONEY

Peanut Butter & Jelly & Hollywwod NIghts

When we speak of the Bob Seger, it’s easy to meander about our disdain for the “music”, and at times the “man”. It’s easy to say, “I’ll tell you what, I really hate that mother fucking turd ball.” It’s understandable. He was everywhere, and often; he was over-rated, played out, and he still is. Frankly, “Like A Rock” is the second worst song, next to “We Built This City” by Starship.

Continue reading

Lo And Behold, A New Hero Cometh

aquaman funeral

“This is what it sounds like, when Silver Age Aquaman dies.”

After the strategic assassination of The Silver Age Aquaman®, it was just a matter of time before the United Villain Front™, led by current president of the United States, Donald Trump, systematically picked off The Superhero Society Force™. 80% of The Force™ were downed in one fell swoop at the funeral. It was sneaky how the bad guys planted a neutralizing dirty bomb on the corpse. Now, most of the heroes were either dead, maimed, incarcerated, crippled, or worse. It mattered naught, for the bottom line was, they were worthless against this powerful organized UVF™. The remaining heroes tried to invent a battle cry based around their 20% status to no avail.

Continue reading