Where the damn hell am I? What the damn hell is this? The last thing I remember was fighting the dreaded Ratzis in France and ohhhh… Yeah, there was an explosion, followed by some crazy glowing dame taking me by the hand and yanking me into a freaking time portal. There’s my where and when, but what? What the damn hell is this?
Wisdom Woman® wondered if The League would correct the gender specification of her membership card.
This was all wrong. Wisdom Woman® should have felt proud, not insecure and so undeserving. Yet, here she was with The Martian Manhunter® in the Justice League satellite®, which orbits 22,300 miles above the Earth’s equator. He was giving her a one-on-one orientation tour. Standing beside the green alien made her feel even more insignificant. He was a genuine superhero. He could fly. He could read minds. He could turn invisible. He had super strength. Granted, his weakness to fire was outright ridiculous.
“This is what it sounds like, when Silver Age Aquaman dies.”
After the strategic assassination of The Silver Age Aquaman®, it was just a matter of time before the United Villain Front™, led by current president of the United States, Donald Trump, systematically picked off The Superhero Society Force™. 80% of The Force™ were downed in one fell swoop at the funeral. It was sneaky how the bad guys planted a neutralizing dirty bomb on the corpse. Now, most of the heroes were either dead, maimed, incarcerated, crippled, or worse. It mattered naught, for the bottom line was, they were worthless against this powerful organized UVF™. The remaining heroes tried to invent a battle cry based around their 20% status to no avail.
And now:
Aquaman’s® ears were burning. Someone or some people were talking about him.
There I was, standing before my criminal peers, as well as the bosses, the dons, the capos, the crime lords, the masterminds, and the world conquerors. My objective is to convince them that I am most worthy to kill our greatest enemy, Aquaman®. I had to call upon all the eloquence Mama Killer Brick taught me. I had to call upon the conviction of every pastor and rabbi I had ever mugged. I don’t want to come off entitled, but my hatred for Aquaman® was humongous. So humongous, there is no term yet invented. If I had to invent that word, gazillious or googolnormous.
The sound of a switchblade and a motorbike.
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