Say Women They Will Come And They Will Go

Posted on November 19, 2018 by sungmokoo

The_Nightmare_Before_Christmas_(2944550316)

SPOILER ALERT: The true nightmare before Christmas is the social anxiety caused by the pressure of having a “merry” Christmas. It’s time to take a chill pill and finish up the rest of that damn Halloween candy.

He was rudely awoken by a girl screaming right into his face. “Daddy, it’s Christmas!” Dan Rabinowitz could barely open his crusted eyes. As is implied by his name, some people called him Danny. Right now, right here, he was pissed off for countless reasons. For starters, it was 8 AM on a Saturday morning in the middle of July. It was hot; the sweaty gross bed sheets clinging to him like aggressive static hot. To say he was hungover would only be half a truth, for technically, he might still be legally inebriated from mere hours before. Lastly, he was a confirmed bachelor, who did not celebrate Christmas. So it made perfect sense that his main thought was what the fuck?

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“The Watcher Watches Superman Light Up A Christmas Tree” by CAST OF SUPERMAN Vs. DR. DRE

Posted on October 28, 2018 by sungmokoo

Watcher Superman
Since it is Halloween week, it seems appropriate to celebrate and honor the often masked superhero. Yet, the mention of Christmas this early in the year is gauche. Sometimes the theme song from “Facts Of Life” encapsulates everything perfectly. “You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have The Facts of Life.”

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Untold Tales Of The Dark Knight

Posted on July 12, 2018 by sungmokoo

Batman teams up with a box of facial tissue, but not before an intense game of CSI: Minesweeper.

Batman sat behind the disturbingly large computer screen, his cowl draped behind his head blending into his cape. This was when he was most at ease, the rare moment of openly being both Batman and Bruce Wayne, watching over his city in the way God may look down on Earth, or a peeping Tom gazing into the biggest window. Even though it was Christmas, he was ever vigilant, for crime never acknowledges religious holidays.

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Elvis Presley’s 35th Christmas

Posted on February 10, 2018 by sungmokoo

Nixon_Elvis_December_21_1970_Meeting_Cropped

On December 21, 1970, the meeting of paranoid minds talk about Watergate. To clarify, Elvis was greatly impressed by the presidential toilet.

If Elvis Aron Presley was anything, he was “regular” and this Christmas was no different. In fact, he was so regular this morning; he had already flushed twice. The bathroom fan was industrial as all get out, and it was doing its job loudly and proficiently. Instead of the stench of poop and urine, it was replaced by myrrh and frankincense. Elvis moaned as a turd snaked out of his orifice obscured by pearly white porcelain. There was a plop, water splashed on his unbeknownst to him, growing white ass cheeks. No one in his posse dared to tell ‘E’ that he was gaining weight. For good measure, Elvis flushed again. He laughed out loud thinking about his honor bound duty.

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